Wednesday, April 22, 2020

In Memory


A dear friend has passed away. For those of you who haven't seen the Facebook post, I have copied it here. 

Hugh was known by pretty much everyone in the East Coast Steampunk scene. He will be missed deeply. 

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10158620528622792&id=753072791
He's gone.

Hugh Casey died on April 21, 2020, at approximately 4:00 p.m.

I have been telling people for hours now, and I'm going to have to keep saying it over and over.  

Overnight, the nursing home sent him to the E.R. due to altered mental state.  The E.R. doctor called me at 4:30 a.m. to let me know that their scans showed that he had a major bleed in his brain, into the side that had been undamaged, away from the surgery last week.  They flew him back to Jefferson Neuroscience, but warned that the prospects were grim.

By 7:30, Jefferson's scans and tests showed that he was brain-dead.  They told us to come in to say goodbye.  

The organ-donor people asked us to let them determine if anything was usable.  I doubted it, given how comprehensive his illnesses have been in the last year, but of course we agreed.  If we had been able to save or enhance another life, that would have been the best way to let him live forever, the best way to bring more happiness to the world.  Unfortunately, after getting his records, they determined that he was not able to be a donor at all.

The official time of death will not have been long after they took him off life support.  But in reality, he was gone before they woke me up this morning.

Due to COVID-19, there will not be any immediate gathering.  Once it's safe to get together again, there will be multiple memorials.  It's customary in non-profit literary science fiction fandom to have a memorial at the next con, or the home con, anyway.  I've been telling Hugh for years now that when he died, I would take the Hugh Casey Traveling Memorial to every convention I could get to for a year, and throw parties to celebrate the people and ideas he loved.  I can't think of a better way to honor him.  Hell, if it goes well, I'll keep it up for decades.

Please do NOT send me flowers.  William Casey can advise if he wants them, or wants them sent somewhere in Hugh's name.  We prefer that donations be sent to any of the following organizations which were meaningful to Hugh and are meaningful to us:  Brian's House;  the Autism Self-Advocacy Network; the American Cancer Society; or the Philadelphia Science Fiction Society.  Juliana or Dusti, would you please track down links and put them in the comments?

No, I'm not okay.  I couldn't possibly be.  But I will be, eventually  In the meantime, I am in the home of Andrew and Janaki (and their adorable infant).  They are hugging me and feeding me.  Juliana is project-managing for me - she will track offers of help as well as the things I need and match them appropriately.  I have a job, and hobbies I haven't had time for in years.  And I'm still moving on May 9, because the lease is signed and I have not choice, so I'm spending the next two weeks packing no matter what I feel.

He's gone.  Hugh Casey is dead.  My beloved, my beautiful boy, my partner, my best friend, will never come home, never speak to me again, never make me laugh or roll my eyes, never make me feel safe despite the world.

But that's not how he wants to be remembered.  He wants you to remember him at his best.  Remember when he made you happy.

The world is sad enough.  And Hugh has always said that the world needs more happy.  Make it so.

-- Stephanie Lucas

P.S. Please feel free to pass on this information.  Please share the post if appropriate.  I don't want Facebook to keep the news from anyone for days or weeks.

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